So yes...I am a nurse...and yes i love being a nurse...it is a part of who i am...it is not simply a job...it's my life. however...i simply can not stand it when strangers approach me and want to show me god knows what and ask things like does this look infected? or tell me your symptoms...and expect me to diagnose you...isn't that what your doctor is for? and don't you pay him for that? and doesn't he get to run about 53 tests before he diagnoses you...weirdo stranger person!!!
I have decided that i'm going to start telling people that i am anything but a nurse when i meet them...maybe that i'm a cosmetologist...at a funeral home!!!
My neighbor spurred this...before i describe that extremely awkward conversation let me say that if my neighbor called me for help because his wife was having a heart attack i'd be there in a minute, happy to help. but that was not the case...i was walking my dog and my creepy neighbor stopped me to talk...he registers about a 7/10 on the creep-o-meter (at first glance he seems ok...then after a minute you get that feeling in your gut to run)...conversation starts off normal enough...talked about my puppy...blah blah blah...and then he said..."i have to ask you something, professionally" and i knew i was in trouble...he followed this up with "i need to have something removed and i don't want to go where my woman works to have it done" oh lord help me now...he then describes that he once had 3 pearls put beneath the skin on his penis to increase his partner's sexual pleasure! OH MY GOD this was awkward!!! so i told him to call a urologist...i'm not sure what he was going for...like an "oh yeah...i'll bring home some local anesthesia from work and i can take them out for you in my garage!" eeewwwwww!!!
These strange things happen all the time when people find out you're a nurse...one day i was getting a pedicure and the nail lady showed me her brand new boobs when nobody was looking...really?! what would possess you to show a total stranger that!!!!
I mean if you need help, I understand and am usually happy to help...but keep your boobs, sexual practices, and infected whatevers to yourself for God's sake!!!
OH my GOD. I am so glad I didn't go into the medical profession. Lordy. I'm really not sure how you kept a straight face during creepy neighbor's pearl penis confession. Who does that?! Who TELLS someone else about it? That they have to pass on the street on a regular basis? Bless your heart Alanna. <3 lol
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